Watching the world go by

The years melt away…as seconds become minutes, minutes become hours.. that become days, weeks, months… years.. And while so much seems to be changing, so much more remains the same. I am the girl I was years ago.. scared, vulnerable.. yet strong and determined.. constantly trying to better myself, to shed my burdensome skin of negativity and yet realising that the more I do it the more I lose myself.. Constantly asking myself, what I will leave when I’m done here.. shall my little steps one day change the world? My thoughts, they take me away.. to a place that may never exist.. they choke me and at the same time give me life…

Today… like yesterday… and the day before.. I continue to search for my purpose, my being, my soul, my dreams.. these things… inextricably linked, intertwined and forever keeping me away from the edge.. away from the abyss that one day will engulf me, eat me whole and never spit me out…

In my quest I have learnt to love, to hate, to cry, to laugh, to embrace and to strangle… all this I have learnt from the world from which I come and to which I shall go. I look at the world in awe as it refuses to change even as the years go by… adamant, stubborn… like myself as I spread my hands out once more as if to fly… I laugh. I cry. I want so much to fly and yet I know it can never be so…not today.. not tomorrow.. but maybe in the next life I will watch the world go by perched upon a tree… until then, the years melt away…

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